Page 122 - THE ENDLESS WAVE | Skateboarding, Death & Spirituality

THE ENDLESS WAVE | PART TWO
When someone crosses over and is no longer with you physically, that is like learning to skate a halfpipe. It feels so foreign and new and could be likened to different stages of grief, which each have their own timing and are experi- enced differently for everyone.
Here are the stages as follows:
1. Finding the ramp — Have you found the ramp? Are you skating the rest of
the park and noticing this one or avoiding it deliberately?
Have you climbed up to the deck of the ramp to check out your surroundings?
Some people deny or can’t believe that their loved one has departed. If you try to ignore the situation during the initial stages of grief you’d miss out on what awaits, leaving you stuck in your mind and emotions. Similarly if you deny the existence of the ramp itself, you may miss out on skating a fun form of terrain.
2. Making preparations — Does your skateboard need checking? Does the ramp need sweeping? You might like to put on a helmet and pads when you are learning to skate a halfpipe, just like how you might like to identify who is around you and can support you through the grieving process.
Just as you would seek out friends that you can share the session with and will encourage, empower and inspire you when you are skateboarding, you’d want to consider others who have experienced grief and can offer you the kind of support that you need.
3. Taking the First Steps — When you climb up the ramp and put the tail of your skateboard on the coping, maybe your knees are shaking, you’re unsure of where to position your body weight and noticing that you’re a number of feet off the ground. The mind starts to wonder, just like when you have a loved one crossed over.
In both instances, you may be asking yourself questions like, “Am I doing this right? Is my foot on the board? Will I make it? What will life be like without this person in my life? Will they be alright? Will they be happy and free of pain or will they be living out their afterlife in pain and sadness?”
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